167 sleeps until Christmas!! That means just under 25 weeks until I reach my first "big" goal of losing 30 pounds by Christmas!
Why Christmas? I love Christmas. And you know, that's when we see all the family and friends, you're wearing sweaters and cute jeans...and those are the things I feel best in...so its my "feel good" time of year.
Why 30 pounds? That puts me at a weight I can actually remember once upon a time...and its a challenge, so I wanted to do something ambitious that forces me to be more active and take WW and my health more seriously...I've been going at it sort of halfheartedly, so maybe this will be the shot in the arm to push me further.Also, since I started the 30 Day Shred (which even with 5lbs weights will make you think you're going to die) I figured 30 is a fitting number.
I'm soooooo excited for this new challenge and new goal!
Keep on doing good, for at the proper time you will reap a harvest if you do not give up. [Galatians 6:9]
Monday, July 11, 2011
Thursday, July 7, 2011
30 Day Shred is NOT a joke!
I have to admit, when it comes to any kind of workout DVD, I'm a skeptic and a half. Today I tried Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred, level one and holy moly its for real. Now, I'm not in the *best* shape of my life, but I've been far worse and after taking the entire month of June off, I needed something to kick my butt back into gear. Well, it worked! I hope I can keep it up for a full 30 days, man that will feel awesome!
Tonight I took my measurements, which I will post at the end of the 30 days...and now...we wait!
So, after taking a month off due to heat and work stress (lame excuses, I know) I only gained 1.2 pounds, which isn't bad at all, so I won't beat myself up over it. My newest goals are to lose 30 pounds by Christmas, and finish the 30 Day Shred.
171 sleeps until Christmas :)
I'm exhausted, but man I'm glad I spent the $8 for Jillian's DVD....thanks WW buddies!
Tonight I took my measurements, which I will post at the end of the 30 days...and now...we wait!
So, after taking a month off due to heat and work stress (lame excuses, I know) I only gained 1.2 pounds, which isn't bad at all, so I won't beat myself up over it. My newest goals are to lose 30 pounds by Christmas, and finish the 30 Day Shred.
171 sleeps until Christmas :)
I'm exhausted, but man I'm glad I spent the $8 for Jillian's DVD....thanks WW buddies!
Sunday, June 26, 2011
A New Decade
"Achievement seems to be connected with action. Successful men and women keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don't quit." - Conrad Hilton
I've officially lost 25 pounds as of this morning! That's ★★★★★ pounds of weight gone! A huge win over PCOS/Thyroid/Hormones/whatever else is wrong with me, but its also a huge win on my confidence level, self-esteem, and of course, overall health.
...then why aren't I more excited?
Don't get me wrong, I'm so PUMPED that I've stuck with something really difficult, forgiven myself when I make mistakes, and continually I see the fruits of my labor (hello, I just donated 6 boxes of clothes that no longer fit me to Goodwill!) but for some reason I feel a little disappointed to see 189.5 on the scale. Looking at it here, however, looks freaking awesome!
I think maybe its the fact that I'm still so far away from my goal...but then I remind myself that I'm 1/3 of the way to my ultimate goal and that seems totally doable. Ahhhh the roller coaster! It's been an emotional week, so I'll chalk it up to that! At least I'm not eating a dozen cupcakes a week and sitting around complaining about things I could change if I didn't spend so much time complaining (that's another quote from somewhere...hmmmm).
I guess I'm just ready for another milestone in my life!If only the other part of my life could catch up :)
"To accomplish great things, we must
not only act, but also dream, not
only plan, but also believe."
- Anatole France
I've officially lost 25 pounds as of this morning! That's ★★★★★ pounds of weight gone! A huge win over PCOS/Thyroid/Hormones/whatever else is wrong with me, but its also a huge win on my confidence level, self-esteem, and of course, overall health.
...then why aren't I more excited?
Don't get me wrong, I'm so PUMPED that I've stuck with something really difficult, forgiven myself when I make mistakes, and continually I see the fruits of my labor (hello, I just donated 6 boxes of clothes that no longer fit me to Goodwill!) but for some reason I feel a little disappointed to see 189.5 on the scale. Looking at it here, however, looks freaking awesome!
I think maybe its the fact that I'm still so far away from my goal...but then I remind myself that I'm 1/3 of the way to my ultimate goal and that seems totally doable. Ahhhh the roller coaster! It's been an emotional week, so I'll chalk it up to that! At least I'm not eating a dozen cupcakes a week and sitting around complaining about things I could change if I didn't spend so much time complaining (that's another quote from somewhere...hmmmm).
I guess I'm just ready for another milestone in my life!If only the other part of my life could catch up :)
"To accomplish great things, we must
not only act, but also dream, not
only plan, but also believe."
- Anatole France
Thursday, June 16, 2011
A New Diagnosis?
Today I went to the doctor for an annual visit and physical--good news, I'm healthy! The doctor was pleased with my weight loss and everything went great. Then, she was looking through my file, which is pretty thick, let's be honest...and noticed that my TSH level from my last visit was elevated. TSH or thyroid-stimulating hormone is basically the "thing" that says whether your pituitary gland is working effectively, less-than-effectively, or super-effectively. A "normal" TSH level, according to my doctor is a 1.2 and my TSH level was a 3.69--yikes!
The term she used was "pre-hypothyroidism" and she prescribed me with two medications to try for two months before I go back. She was very open about this being trial and error because medicine is not an exact science where every patient fits every care plan, but said its worth a shot. So, we'll see how that goes.
Victoza has helped me tremendously, and I will also still be taking that. But, I can't deny that I am still very tired, my hair is still falling out, and I still have dry skin....it just isn't as bad as it used to be :) so, I'll update again in 2 months when I have more information. For now, I'm keeping an open mind!
The term she used was "pre-hypothyroidism" and she prescribed me with two medications to try for two months before I go back. She was very open about this being trial and error because medicine is not an exact science where every patient fits every care plan, but said its worth a shot. So, we'll see how that goes.
Victoza has helped me tremendously, and I will also still be taking that. But, I can't deny that I am still very tired, my hair is still falling out, and I still have dry skin....it just isn't as bad as it used to be :) so, I'll update again in 2 months when I have more information. For now, I'm keeping an open mind!
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Fat Talk
This is a post from another blogger I recently came across...
ALL CREDITS FOR THE INFORMATION BELOW CAN BE FOUND HERE: http://www.healthytippingpoint.com/ob/fat-talk
This was just too powerful not to share.
--
[[ PART I ]]
If you’re a long-time reader, you know the issue of Fat Talk is something I take very seriously. As Jillian Michaels said,"Fat talk is transcending…. It affects your reality and damages you professionally, personally, and physically."
I’ve posted this video about Fat Talk a few times before, but not recently. If you haven’t watched this before, please do! It’s so powerful and I cry every time:
* Don’t compare your body to others.
* Appreciate your body for what it can do.
* Turn a negative into a positive. Instead of "I’m stocky," try "I’m strong!"
* Never Fat Talk in front of your kids or friends.
[[ PART II ]]
This section of the Fat Talk discussion is dedicated to the statement, "I feel so fat."
How many times have you eaten something and then said, "Ugh. I feel so fat"? This is completely hyperbolic reaction to overindulging. First of all, even skinny women who aren’t "fat’ say it. Secondly, there’s no way one meal or one dessert can suddenly make you "fat."
So, what do we really mean when we say, "I’m so fat"? We actually mean that we are FULL WITH AN EMOTION. Oftentimes, it’s shame. Or sadness. Or fear. Why do we express our inner turmoil by hating our bodies? Because that’s what Fat Talk and society tells us to do. Don’t admit you’re scared, just feel fat! Don’t admit you’re lonely or depressed, you’re just fat! We can deal with ugliness, we cannot deal with weakness. The next time you feel the urge to say, "I’m so fat," think about what you REALLY mean. By berating your body, you aren’t doing any favors. But by honoring your emotions, you’re living a happier, more honest life.
[[ PART III ]]
If only one thing about this discussion about Fat Talk resonates with you, remember this: When you feel guilty about food, you are experiencing distorted thinking.
I’m not saying that means you have an eating disorder. I’m just saying that feeling guilty — raw, consuming, upsetting GUILT — is not a normal, healthy reaction to eating and is thus distorted. I think it’s important to recognize when our thinking is distorted, as the way we view ourselves has a big impact on our lot in life. All women experience guilt with food to some degree. I know I used to feel a really guilty if I drank two beers and ate a few slices of pizza. Or a big dessert. Sometimes, it didn’t even have to be a calorie-heavy meal to trigger the guilt. I’d have a bigger breakfast than normal, and I would fret that I’d "blown it" for the day or that I’d "given into temptation."
Guilt is internal Fat Talk.
It is shaming yourself for not meeting a perfectionist ideal that is unattainable and determined by the rigid standards our society has created! If you wouldn’t say it out loud to a friend, why would you say it to yourself?
Maybe right now you’re thinking: "But a little guilt can be a GOOD thing!" or "Guilt is a normal reaction to indulging!" But, if guilt was healthy or "normal," it would be PRODUCTIVE and it would make you HAPPY. Do you find yourself feeling guilty over food a lot? Well, then — you’re repeating the same actions over and over again, and clearly… Guilt isn’t productive, it doesn’t work, and it only serves to lower your self -esteem. Guilt is a waste of time and takes away from productive things you could be doing with your time — meditating, studying, sleeping, calling your friends on the phone, and more.
* You aren’t going to gain weight from one dessert.
* You aren’t a bad person for enjoying dinner.
* You aren’t weak because you were hungrier than normal.
How do you stop guilt? It’s so much harder to stop than Fat Talk — after all, we verbalize Fat Talk to others and it’s easier to "catch" ourselves in conversation. Guilt, on the other hand, is this weird, creeping feeling that takes over you, ruins your day, and triggers the blues. I would say I cut down on my guilt thinking by about 90%, which I consider to be a big accomplishment. I stopped guilting myself by really thinking about my eating in the grand scheme of life. Did that pizza make me gain weight? No. Did it actually hurt my health in any measurable way that I ate a bunch of French fries? No. Am I an awesome friend and hard worker who is so much more than the food she eats? Of course!
If there is something about your lifestyle that you want to change, be proactive and CHANGE IT. Guilting yourself about it does not work. Taking action to move onwards and upwards does. Every setback is an opportunity to learn, grow, and improve.
Join me on the quest to eliminate Fat Talk in all its nasty and evil forms from our lives! Remember, it starts now… and it starts with you.
ALL CREDITS FOR THE INFORMATION BELOW CAN BE FOUND HERE: http://www.healthytippingpoint.com/ob/fat-talk
This was just too powerful not to share.
--
[[ PART I ]]
If you’re a long-time reader, you know the issue of Fat Talk is something I take very seriously. As Jillian Michaels said,"Fat talk is transcending…. It affects your reality and damages you professionally, personally, and physically."
I’ve posted this video about Fat Talk a few times before, but not recently. If you haven’t watched this before, please do! It’s so powerful and I cry every time:
* Don’t compare your body to others.
* Appreciate your body for what it can do.
* Turn a negative into a positive. Instead of "I’m stocky," try "I’m strong!"
* Never Fat Talk in front of your kids or friends.
[[ PART II ]]
This section of the Fat Talk discussion is dedicated to the statement, "I feel so fat."
How many times have you eaten something and then said, "Ugh. I feel so fat"? This is completely hyperbolic reaction to overindulging. First of all, even skinny women who aren’t "fat’ say it. Secondly, there’s no way one meal or one dessert can suddenly make you "fat."
So, what do we really mean when we say, "I’m so fat"? We actually mean that we are FULL WITH AN EMOTION. Oftentimes, it’s shame. Or sadness. Or fear. Why do we express our inner turmoil by hating our bodies? Because that’s what Fat Talk and society tells us to do. Don’t admit you’re scared, just feel fat! Don’t admit you’re lonely or depressed, you’re just fat! We can deal with ugliness, we cannot deal with weakness. The next time you feel the urge to say, "I’m so fat," think about what you REALLY mean. By berating your body, you aren’t doing any favors. But by honoring your emotions, you’re living a happier, more honest life.
[[ PART III ]]
If only one thing about this discussion about Fat Talk resonates with you, remember this: When you feel guilty about food, you are experiencing distorted thinking.
I’m not saying that means you have an eating disorder. I’m just saying that feeling guilty — raw, consuming, upsetting GUILT — is not a normal, healthy reaction to eating and is thus distorted. I think it’s important to recognize when our thinking is distorted, as the way we view ourselves has a big impact on our lot in life. All women experience guilt with food to some degree. I know I used to feel a really guilty if I drank two beers and ate a few slices of pizza. Or a big dessert. Sometimes, it didn’t even have to be a calorie-heavy meal to trigger the guilt. I’d have a bigger breakfast than normal, and I would fret that I’d "blown it" for the day or that I’d "given into temptation."
Guilt is internal Fat Talk.
It is shaming yourself for not meeting a perfectionist ideal that is unattainable and determined by the rigid standards our society has created! If you wouldn’t say it out loud to a friend, why would you say it to yourself?
Maybe right now you’re thinking: "But a little guilt can be a GOOD thing!" or "Guilt is a normal reaction to indulging!" But, if guilt was healthy or "normal," it would be PRODUCTIVE and it would make you HAPPY. Do you find yourself feeling guilty over food a lot? Well, then — you’re repeating the same actions over and over again, and clearly… Guilt isn’t productive, it doesn’t work, and it only serves to lower your self -esteem. Guilt is a waste of time and takes away from productive things you could be doing with your time — meditating, studying, sleeping, calling your friends on the phone, and more.
* You aren’t going to gain weight from one dessert.
* You aren’t a bad person for enjoying dinner.
* You aren’t weak because you were hungrier than normal.
How do you stop guilt? It’s so much harder to stop than Fat Talk — after all, we verbalize Fat Talk to others and it’s easier to "catch" ourselves in conversation. Guilt, on the other hand, is this weird, creeping feeling that takes over you, ruins your day, and triggers the blues. I would say I cut down on my guilt thinking by about 90%, which I consider to be a big accomplishment. I stopped guilting myself by really thinking about my eating in the grand scheme of life. Did that pizza make me gain weight? No. Did it actually hurt my health in any measurable way that I ate a bunch of French fries? No. Am I an awesome friend and hard worker who is so much more than the food she eats? Of course!
If there is something about your lifestyle that you want to change, be proactive and CHANGE IT. Guilting yourself about it does not work. Taking action to move onwards and upwards does. Every setback is an opportunity to learn, grow, and improve.
Join me on the quest to eliminate Fat Talk in all its nasty and evil forms from our lives! Remember, it starts now… and it starts with you.
Friday, June 10, 2011
(( *G*O*A*L* ))
I switched my weigh-in days to Friday mornings instead of Saturdays and today was a fan-freaking-tastic day! I hit my 10% goal, bringing me to a total loss of 22.4 pounds. WAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! That's some serious celebration right there!
I'm so proud of myself, but I have to also be proud of the fact that it took me a while to lose those pounds and reach this goal. It isn't that I don't want to lose quickly (I mean really, lets get those last 47 pounds gone shall we??) but my overall goal is to be HEALTHY and losing weight slowly, eating real food, every day, exercising regularly (but not like a crazy person) is WORKING! Weight Watcher Works. Period. It isn't a diet, it isn't temporary, it changes the way I think about food and the way I define “healthy” and it works for me and millions of other people.
I’m proud of the fact that its taken me six months to reach this goal. I’m proud that every week I lost 0.4 pounds I kept pushing and didn’t give up. I’m even more proud that when the scale said +1.2 I didn’t give up. And I didn’t give up because this is REAL LIFE and that means its going to fluctuate, change, and be imperfect. There’s something incredibly gratifying about working hard to achieve my goals.
And now, I’m working towards my next goal: another 10% (about 20 more pounds) but I’m 1/3 of the way to my Ultimate Goal, which is a pretty awesome place to be! It sure beats where I was six months ago :o)
Remember, nothing works unless you do!
I'm so proud of myself, but I have to also be proud of the fact that it took me a while to lose those pounds and reach this goal. It isn't that I don't want to lose quickly (I mean really, lets get those last 47 pounds gone shall we??) but my overall goal is to be HEALTHY and losing weight slowly, eating real food, every day, exercising regularly (but not like a crazy person) is WORKING! Weight Watcher Works. Period. It isn't a diet, it isn't temporary, it changes the way I think about food and the way I define “healthy” and it works for me and millions of other people.
I’m proud of the fact that its taken me six months to reach this goal. I’m proud that every week I lost 0.4 pounds I kept pushing and didn’t give up. I’m even more proud that when the scale said +1.2 I didn’t give up. And I didn’t give up because this is REAL LIFE and that means its going to fluctuate, change, and be imperfect. There’s something incredibly gratifying about working hard to achieve my goals.
And now, I’m working towards my next goal: another 10% (about 20 more pounds) but I’m 1/3 of the way to my Ultimate Goal, which is a pretty awesome place to be! It sure beats where I was six months ago :o)
Remember, nothing works unless you do!
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Letting Go and Letting In
"Listen, it's too big a world to be in competition with everyone. The only person who I have to be better than is myself. And in your case, that's enough." -Col. Potter, M*A*S*H
I've been fighting myself a lot lately, but I guess that's a good thing considering I've learned so much. Most of all, I've learned it really is too big a world to be in a competition with everybody else especially when we aren't all running the same race. The story is the same in work, school, relationships, interests...and its also human nature to compare me to them; the problem is that you can't compare apples to oranges or Katys to Emilys, for example. And I don't have a single friend named Emily, so no one can get offended that I used them in my blog. Ha!
I walked into yoga tonight not feeling particularly stressed or that I "needed" a good session, I wanted one and wanting to do something is half the battle. It ended up being a rather fortuitous decision I made because it played up to some things I was thinking about today: I'm 22, David's 30, we've been dating 2 years and we're not married, or engaged. What's the rush? I don't feel it, he doesn't feel it, and we both agree and talk very candidly about the fact that yes, we want to marry one another and see that in our future, so why the pressure? Comparison. All my friends are getting married, while all his friends are getting divorces. Why rush?
So, in yoga tonight one of the readings was about a pond creature, frog we'll say, who was complaining about not being able to find water. He worried and worried over his apparent lack of water, and failed to consider that he was swimming while he worried--in nothing other than water! The moral of the story is basically that sometimes all we actually need is what we already have. There is the constant thought of seeking truth, seeking happiness, seeking fulfillment--things we would all realize we already possess if we just stopped trying to possess it.
That reminded me of another favorite quote: "Why must we have something to look forward to? Why can't we just look at now?" [and for the life of Google I can't find who said it...Rubin something...]
Anyway, the thing is I can't compare my life to anyone else because the reality is that no one else would "get it" and the only person who comes close is the person who shares my life with me: David. I've read all the articles about "How to Get your Guy to Propose" and some of those things are just crazy--and mean--and not even close to what I want. But, the same could be said for weight-loss and being healthy too--ultimately, you can read the books, take the quizzes, ask your friends and you know what? You do what's right for you and it almost always NEVER follows a pattern someone else set. You can take tips and hints and learn from experience, but all in all, you have to figure it out on your own based on your own heart, needs, and feelings.
I thought about all of this today and it brought me a lot of peace. Because even when I've had a bad day, I'm hormonal, my hair is falling out, I forget to take my shot and get sick, or we catch a stomach bug from an adorable baby nephew--I've got a rock and a partner in David and that's enough for me. It doesn't matter what everyone else is doing because I'm not interested in living their lives, I want to live mine!
I think the above is true in all aspects of life. If you keep looking for something you think is out of reach, you'll never find it. But when you realize everything you ever needed was right in front of you all along, you'll find inner peace and happiness and silliness!
Once upon a time David asked me what I wanted out of life in general, and my response was this:
In general...I just want to be happy. I think I deserve to be loved and taken care of, while also loving and taking care of someone else. I want to have a family...but I don't expect things to be perfect...I want to love and be loved by someone who can make me laugh, take me seriously, love me and help me relax when I take myself too seriously...someone who is supportive of me and my crazy dreams and anal retentive tendencies....and when I have that person, nothing else matters....I want to be in a relationship where I'm not inferior and I feel valued. Where my opinions are welcomed even if disagreed with...I want to have FUN! I've never just had fun...I want someone who can look at me and make me feel like I am the only thing in the world that matters...I used to think that I what I wanted was complicated and that's why I hadn't found it...I realized a few months ago that what I want isn't complicated at all...it's all in you and there's nothing complicated about that.
Some times we just need a reminder that everything we need, we already have...and when we count our blessings and let go of our worries, we can let love in!
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