Thursday, February 2, 2012

Things I've Learned

This whole PCOS thing has been a roller coaster. Weight goes up, goes down, goes up a little, struggle harder to make it go down. Overall though, I've never felt better in my life!

I've learned a lot over the last couple of years, and the main things I've learned are to never give up and never stop learning.

I learn something new every day whether I want to or not. Yesterday, for example, I was reminded that during yoga, when you're out like an airplane with one leg bent out over your back while balancing on the other leg, you don't think about it. Just do it. The second you start to think about it: think about what you look like, look at the people around--you lose balance and fall. You have to actively think about not thinking. Whoa.

Airplane pose

I've learned what makes me feel strong and what makes me feel foolish. I prefer feeling strong, but feeling foolish affords me a different type of learning--humility. I learned that I hate Zumba. I don't like the way it makes me feel, the way I look, the way I try to translate the songs from Spanish into makes me feel like a beached walrus trying frantically to move forward up an icy slope to get to the top. A Sisyphus walrus who sucks at Zumba.

Spinning, however, and the class called "Power" make me feel ten-feet tall and bullet proof. I feel strong. Powerful. Accomplished. I'm proud of every last drop of boob sweat I earn there. Yoga does the same thing....and if you think you won't sweat in yoga you're w-r-o-n-g!

I've learned to hold myself accountable. If I want a cookie, I'll have a cookie. I don't hide what I eat from anyone, eating didn't cause PCOS and eating won't get rid of it. I'm responsible for taking my medicine, getting enough sleep, managing my stress, working out, and being honest with myself.

I've learned to love myself. As I am. Right now. I'm nearing the 40 pound loss mark--yay--but sometimes I get on the scale and I'm terrified that I'll all nearly 40 pounds back on over night. I'm so much more than that number though. And even though I jump up and down now that my size 14 pants are as big as 18s felt a few months ago, I know I'm more than that number too (but boy do those 12s feel good!).

Finally, I've learned how much I love talking about the changes I've made in my life! Not because I'm an example, a role model, an inspiration. I'm only so honest in my blogs because I pretend that no one reads them. But, you never know who needs to hear what you have to say--good, bad, or ugly. And you never know whose life you might change just by sharing something about yours. That goes for all aspects of life.


"Victory belongs to the most persevering."
- Napoleon

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